I think it has been forever since I have posted. I have a kazillion things to always say, but for some reason it sounds retarded (shocker!) when i get it down. I've been in quite the reflective mode for some time now and a few thoughts are coming out tonight.
First of all, I cannot get over how blessed I truly am. I am married to the only man who truly caught my eye, who is my best friend, and who I am always humbled with the amount of love and affection and loyalty that he has for me. I have always felt like Jack could really see who I was even past the facade that i felt like I needed to display at one point in my life. And he loves the real me. And that means a lot to a person who is very unsure of herself in so many ways.
Next, my kids are the most awesome ever. You may disagree with me because of some bias towards your own, But sorry, it's just not true. Each one of my kids is so different. I've never been a person who goes by the book (which I've for the most part thought was bogus cause I think its a crap shoot for all of us)...i'm more of a shoot from the hip kind of a gal. That being said, I am happy that the more kids that I have, I am becoming the parent that I want to be. I really am getting better at it. In fact, our next door neighbor came over today to tell me that my almost 5 year old was stuck up on the cement wall that divides our houses and that he needed help getting down. It makes me laugh. Jackson can scale our rod iron fence with his toes and pull himself up onto the roof by balancing on the toes of one foot like its no big thing. So I went to the back honestly expecting that he was stuck like our neighbor said he was, but he was leaning against the roof of their house six feet above the ground in his dark bad guy spiderman costume chewing on a piece of grass. Seriously? Where did he come from? We need trees to climb, dangit!
I think something that I truly appreciate the most is the Savior said to come unto him as a little child. Two examples in the last few days. Jack and I MAJORLY got after Emma and sent her and the other kids to bed early. I went in quite sometime later to turn off lights and she was in her bed writing us a letter telling us that she loved us. Talk about humility. She was such a good example. Yet another. We got after Jackson tonight at dinner for acting inappropriate and we were probably a little too hard. He didn't even want to eat dinner anymore and he wouldn't allow us to hug him for a while. Anyhow, after eating his dinner I told him he could have a popsicle and he broke it in half and gave it to Jack. It was so perfect. Nothing was said he just had moved on and was being perfectly sweet. I love that boy.
At church I was feeling a little sad. We have only four Sundays left before we move from Cali. There are so many reasons why I can't wait to move. We are really excited to start the part of life that we have been working toward our whole married life. However, I have made so many dear friends that it breaks my heart to leave. I love women the women in my church. The women that I have worked with in Young Women the last four years are AMAZING. They are some of my favorite people. There is always the fear when I move and leave those that mean so much to me. I think I know that there are good people everywhere, but is there going to be a friend who gets me and loves me anyway? I'm starting a prayer for that one already!